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Empathy? Wear Your Own Shoes For A Change!

Empath? Wear your own shoes for a change

© Thomas Hawk

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After reading the blog post by Maya – “Empathy or plain self-neglect”, and following on from my blog “Be Good to You”, coupled with experiencing a very trying month, I have had cause to examine this thing we call “Empathy”.

What is empathy?

There is sometimes a misunderstanding between sympathy and empathy. According to the Oxford Dictionary definitions, “empathy” is the ability to understand and share the feelings of another, while “sympathy” is feelings of pity and sorrow for someone else’s misfortune. Empathy is therefore much deeper as one actually shares the other person’s feelings, not just understand or acknowledge them.

When we are growing up our parents and teachers tell us to have empathy, “put yourself in the other guy’s shoes, look at things from his or her perspective” – valuable advice that can go a long way in assisting us with our people skills. It becomes much easier to understand where someone is coming from if one is able to see things from their perspective. But having real empathy actually requires that we share their feelings, that they become our feelings too.

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By on May 1, 2013 in happiness, relationships

Passion: Bringing Meaning To Our Existence

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We all know that something isn’t right with today’s society. Something is missing.

We go through life doing everything we’re suppose to: we go to work, we get married, we have children, we save for retirement. And yet, even if we follow this recipe exactly, we might still feel that life is empty and meaningless.

Although we’ve made incredible scientific progress, we aren’t any happier. To the contrary, depression and anxiety are at an all-time high.

What happened?!?

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By on March 10, 2013 in career, relationships

4 Steps To Keep The Love Alive

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John Lennon, the wise philosopher, said that “all you need is love.”

But, there is a deep valley separating philosophy from real life. Sometimes, we need more than just love to make a relationship work.

Don’t get me wrong, love is an important ingredient. But to keep the love alive, we need more than just philosophy. Love is all we need as long as we are also willing to work hard to keep it alive. Relationships cannot be sustained without constant rejuvenation and reinvention.

Valentine’s Day reminds us that we need to celebrate our love. But, the truth is that we need to remind ourselves how to truly love for the remaining 364 days of the year. And as the years go by, we need to work harder and harder to sustain it.

Long-term relationships go through tremendous change and the expectations/projections we started with are lost over the years. As time goes by, we lose some of these projections that we hang so neatly on our partner and consequently develop disappointments, anger, and sometimes even hatred towards our loved ones. In order to keep the love going, we need to resolve these emotions.

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By on February 10, 2013 in relationships